The following are a selection of very funny legal tips from a US criminal lawyer (L. Scott Briscoe).
- Men, when a woman asks you to send proof of your girth and length by holding a credit card next to it in the photo, it’s not your pride and joy she’s wanting to see.
- When using a friend’s urine in an attempt to pass a drug screen, drug test your friend first.
- Do not plan your next felony over the payphone in jail next to the sign that reads “All phone calls are monitored and recorded”.
- Do not ask the victim with a restraining order against you for a ride to court for a hearing to determine whether you have violated your restraining order.
- When selecting your alibi, do not choose one who was already in jail while you were “not” committing your own crime.
- Avoid bashing the judge in your case on Facebook, especially AFTER you friended him on said Facebook.
- When telling the judge you need to get out of jail to donate a spare organ to your dying mother, choose an organ you can spare, such as a kidney. Your liver does not come in a pair and you will need it.
The full list can be found here
Contact Richard Jenkins on 07837 762705 or Richard@clariclegal.co.uk for further advice or assistance (but not on criminal law!).